Eveline works as a security employee after working for over 10 years as an entrepreneur. She was in newspaper business and worked at night. Divorced her spouse, she already did everything by herself, and decided she was better off without than with him. Her three children are very close to her and the first night she was here, immediately an entire family with friends surrounded her with all their love and compassion. Very moving to witness…
Eveline is a hard working mom who lives on her own, 53 and she has been through a lot. Survived three ‘” bad” marriages, raised her children practically on her own and overcame breast cancer. Had a brain stroke in 2007, cause was stress and exhaustion, too much working at night and a lot of worries.
What more could she handle….Still Eveline is a very empowered gal, who WANTS to live and now is digesting her fears…I told her that you cannot absorb fear, when you want to get rid of fear the best way in my opinion is to be aware of the fear and then let go of it in a deciding way. She agreed…
Eveline does not have very much confidence in love relationships anymore. Except for the caring and loving family and friends that surround her, she is fearful for what’s about letting a man get into her life again. She is alone for 2 years now.
I asked her why.
‘Because of the bad experiences I have had in the past’ she told me.
‘What did these bad experiences bring you, except for the bad memories?’I wanted to know.
‘That I can depend on me, knowing that I can decide what my wants are and what to do with it. Meeting my friends without getting negative comments. And to practice my religion in the way that feels best for me. That helps me getting back my confidence too.’
‘What difference do you feel now you are here and doctors treat you this way?’ I wanted to know.
‘I feel finally heard. I had seen my own doctor several times and he did not send me to another doctor than the plastic surgery doctor here. He thought the troubles were caused by the ibreast mplant I got after my breast cancer. I had the feeling four over four months that I was drowning…(Which was a great description since we are not designed to breathe under water, she da over 2 liters of liquid behind her lungs!!! ) I almost choked, it was like I was under water’ she told me. ‘Now the liquid is leaving my body, the pressure goes down and I can feel life stream back into me. I really thought I would not live very long anymore, even told my children this. My doctor said he thought I was depressed and wanted me to go to a psychologist…’
‘Well, how do you look at your doctor now?’ I was curious to know.
In the hospital was discovered that she had a pneumothorax, it almost killed her. Eveline had seen her doctor for several times but he did not diagnose it. Her problems started before Christmas last year and now she has a drain into her lung and there already came out 2 liters of liquid. No wonder she couldn’t breathe! She first got a drain that was badly done, a not very well experienced doctor did it the first time. It needs to be done under the lung and not above the lung. Through the hole in her side, the liquid started to stream out, but she had to wait till the next day for another doctor.I felt very upset by this way of treatment because the chance of infection is high with an open entrance to the lung.
Nurses treated it with sterile vaseline and put a bandage on it for the night, which was soakened wet the next morning. That day she was taken care of and a real good doctor did it this time. He made a new entrance for the drain in her side and now the liquid could be drained out of her body. This was all done with a drug so she would not feel the pain. But unfortunately Eveline reacted in an allergic way to the anesthesia and got an epileptic seizure….Why?
This question remained with me, why does one person seem to get everything and another person nothing? And is it possible that we CHOOSE these reactions? That we create circumstances that will bring us insights? The lessons of life we do not take in, will be shown to us in different appearances, to show us what there is to learn. Untill we have actually learned these lessons, they will repeat itself. Or does it happen to us for no reason at all?
Now, most of our readers know that I am a person that does believe in a reason for EVERYTHING. Nothing happens to us, just to tease us or bother us. But what’s in it for Eveline here?
She says she does not know it.
What does this want to tell her? Could it be that she is FORCED to take time for Eveline herself? Is it time for her to think over her life the way it is and decide what SHE WANTS out of it instead of feeling a “victim”?
I talked about this with her. She told me that she is deadly afraid of getting another bad guy in her life, but does not feel like a victim.
Now this is an interesting thing….Eveline REALLY wants more Love in her life but because of her bad experiences with guys, she does not trust LOVE anymore and sends it away. She does not BELIEVE that something good can come to her anymore. So, she designs a life without a guy, though that actually is what she does want! Makes sense?
I explained to her that when you are focussing on what you do NOT WANT, you ATTRACT it! Better think about what you DO WANT. So I suggested to send her my wants list which I will add here. Wants list Mary
A wants list can be made for a love relationship, work, friends, life….it is very important to FIRST know what your true WANTS are, before deciding what person could possible fit into that. It is far more difficult to NOT know what your wants are and then decide what you will do….sounds logical isn’t it?
By focussing on what you do NOT WANT you attract it. When I ask you NOT to think about a table, you already SEE the table and that is what you send out to The Others. By focussing on what you DO WANT you attract it the same way…
I attracted Brian to come into my life, the way he attracted me into his life. By focussing on what WE WANTED….Our wants lists are almost similar. Our view on life is the same, our humor is the same, and our love is an effortless one. So, don’t believe all of The Others who say true love does not exist….believe in what YOU want and attract the person that will fit you on ALL LEVELS… It does exist, it can happen, as long as you CREATE it!