As I did some groceries I was drawn to a magazine. With big letters was written down: How much do they need? With pictures of rich people and their big expensive houses and 30 cars, still wanting more.
This made me think. How much do WE need? How much do I need?
Thinking this over I realized that everything I own is a lie. Nothing is really mine. I do not OWN things, somehow they seem to own ME…
Of course I totally realize I am no material girl. I do not hold on to expensive things at all. I don’t need expensive jewelry from anyone to express Love to me. I believe in acts of Love. My interest in things are my interest in the ones with an emotional value. I DO own a lot of stuff! WOW!
Little things with memories, paintings, a note from my children, a cabinet that belonged to my grandma etc. etc. I further know I own more than one pair of shoes, never threw any shoe away for at least 10 years!. As I am cleaning up the attic, I find myself travelling through my past ……..looking at stuff coming out of boxes I see my life come by. Why on earth do I still keep little things like that cute trouser my son had when he was 2? Or that pretty dress my daughter absolutely adored? It is because I cherish the illusion I can keep the moment, can freeze time holding it in my hand? It is an illusion….Fried air………..just as control is…..or believing I can be prepared for whatever the next moment of life will bring me. To live is to change…Nothing stays the same. What seemed to be a certainty one second ago, can be changed within a tenth of the next second.
I felt shocked as I read about the breaking up of friends in America. What seemed to be a real good and solid engagement, fell apart in a moment. I know everything happens with a reason, to create even better opportunities in life for us. But man! It does hurt! But looking back, when you choose to SEE, you will find more than one clue why it did not work. And feel peace with that. I experienced this myself several times. I still Love and cherish all the good memories ex boyfriends and I shared together. I still am friends with most of them. Last week I had dinner with my ex boyfriend W. And as I was looking at him I simply knew Love has many faces. He is such a good guy, a Giver as I am. And though it did not work out between us, it did bring me the space I needed to gain more insights…
My sweet friend C.L is travelling through her life and gains the insights she was looking for, insights that bring her back to who she really is. She is choosing to be the real C.L. and literally takes some space now, to understand who she is and what SHE wants out of life and in what way… She is a very brave and intuitive , very gifted, very talented and very sparkling person! Charismatic in a pure way. She can decide to sweep herself down to the floor looking back and judging herself. But she does not CHOOSE to do that anymore!! She is who she DECIDES to be! F… the assholes who have told her she was different than who she truly is. And thank them at the same time! Because of them she is gaining her insights now too…Everything in Life is connected.
When we Choose to SEE what is there for us, we only have to reach out for it. It is already there…waiting for us. We have friends around us we do not yet know as friends, still they are there. Waiting to be our friends. Do we SEE them? Do we reach out for them? Do we want to SHARE? Instead of HIDING?….
Okay, back to some emotions as Greed, Love, Hate and not to forget Anger…what do they do with you? And how about Loss? Does it make you stronger? Or do you choose to “bitter”?
I have been through breaking ups several times in my life, as I told you before. It taught me a lot. I went through Love, Hate, Anger, I went through Loss…The only thing I personally never had any issues with was Greed. Ialso do not care about expensive things as I wrote before. And even the things which hold a memory for me, in fact are nothing but a projected emotion. I can decide what to do with that, hold on to it, or let go of it. The real memory is kept safe and sound in my soul. Scarfed in and therefore eternal; endless…. So, I decide to take them with me…each precious memory. I cherish them. And when time is ready, I will reconsider each of them. I will see if Iwant to let go of the memory or decide to keep it so it can travel with me through Life. So it can teach me. Time after time.
Every time I survived a relationship I became stronger. And understood more about ME….
With Brian I feel I have a solid and strong soul connected Love relationship. I choose to be with my beloved Brian. Despite what all the critics may say I believe in Brian an me. I believe in our adventure of Love, in our adventure of Life together. I will write down some of the thoughts The Others have about my relationship with Brian:
What would happen to me when it would fall apart? How would I feel? What would be the outcome of losing the Love of my Life? What if SOMETHING happened to our Love? What if one of us would meet someone else in the time we are apart? What would we choose?
What would we decide?…….
The answer is very simple. I do not choose to think this over at all. Not even when The Others are pointing out all of these “possible” thoughts to me.
Why would I think this over when I don’t know if this is really happening?
Why would I think this over when I feel Trust?
Why do you think gossip magazines make millions of dollars?
Because we are always believing and imagining things?…..
Unrealistic things? Things we can not be sure off but do like to fantasize about?
People we admire seem to be real people after all, with the same issues we have! Why are divorces of the rich and famous people so attractive to us? Why on earth do we WANT to read about that? Because…? Is it because we are jealous? Do we ENJOY it when the rich and famous fall down? Why?
By thinking for The Others we make Life more complexe than it can be. By believing the worst will happen to us we create Unhappiness. Why? So we can already feel prepared for that? But Life will ALWAYS take us to some place we did not expect! We CANNOT PREPARE for that. We can TRUST we will experience everything that will bring us to where we belong. Where we can discover the true values we need and want in our lives. When you feel TRUST, you do not worry. It’s as simple as that.
When Brian and I are apart, like we are now, I choose to TRUST him. Does this mean I can be sure he is honest and true to me, is not hiding from me? Does this mean I can be sure he does not cheat on me? No. But because I CHOOSE to put TRUST on Brian, I do NOT choose to think about other things and start to worry about that. The Others do point out to me that I am naive and ask me why I feel I can Trust. They seem to believe that only the worst can happen to me. I don’t. And that is because I CHOOSE TO TRUST.
I could have chosen to worry all the time, not knowing where Brian is and with who he is. I would drive myself totally NUTS doing that! I believe that the base of a stabile Love relationship is TRUST. I choose to TRUST Brian. As he chooses to TRUST me! I can only talk for myself and KNOW I am to be Trusted. What would a (Love) relationship be without TRUST?
Does this mean that whenever Trust would get a dent, we will judge and run away? (Out of fear, or because we don not want to feel hurt) Could be, could be not. It all depends on the (Love) relationship you are in, what you decide to believe is true and what is not.
It is hugely important what your inner voice is telling you and what you have denied in this before. About what you decide when you look at the total package, listening to what your inner voice is telling you and has been telling you before. When it has told you this is not meant to be, you will realize you only WANTED it meant to be. By then it’s clear you denied certain signals. Your inner voice is something different than what you are afraid of or what you project because you want to see certain things.
Your inner voice is the little voice within you that is telling what’s best for YOU. Still that is a CHOICE! To listen to your inner voice or to deny it and experience things the hard way.
One thing I learned from Brian is that all that matters is the Here and Now……So why think about things that did not happen? Why writing all kind of doom scenario’s in our head? Here’s what I do:
I choose to be PRESENT and give myself the PRESENT of being PRESENT in the PRESENT…………………..
People who feel Greed are 99% of the time busy with the future and the past. To keep what they have to themselves instead of sharing their wealth with The Others. They see The Others as a threat. They are busy with all kind of stuff in the future so they can get more money.Their want is to have more and more and more. Why? They forget to live in the Here and Now. It is possible that because of their past, (for eample: they have felt rejected) they gather lots of wealth around them in the present in order to prove they DESERVE it to be seen and heard. This is their self created “certainty”…
This is their safety… Because they OWN lots of money they might believe they can OWN people or situations…and therefore are in CONTROL of it…They Demand….they do not Ask…all out of Fear?
I have been working at the airport when I was younger. One day we had a situation with very bad weather that made it impossible for the airplanes to fly. The difference between rich and “poor” was huge that evening. People with lots of money were exposing a disrespectful attitude. I do not want to judge them in a negative way, I just notice they were impatient and very easily irritated. People who owned almost nothing shared what they had with other passengers. Water, food, warm clothing. The heat had gone down that night as well. The fog would not disappear till at least the next morning.
Rich people started to demand facilities. But all of the hotels were overbooked because of a congress in town. However, there were some cheap hotel rooms available. They refused to sleep in cheap hotels. The “poor” people did not complain. They did not ask for a hotel, they did not get angry. They accepted the message and made the best of the situation by lying down at the seats and taking care of each other.
Of course this is not the way it always goes. I also know wealthy people who are respectful and less wealthy people who are not. But that night I saw that people who are used to get what they want in a quick way, do not (always) appreciate what they already have. What rich people take for granted, can be a desire for the “poor” people. Like having a house to live in, food for each day and clothing and school for the kids. A car or a television. A ticket for the cinema or a football game. What is normal for the wealthy ones, can be extraordinary to the “poor” people.
Now for when it come s to what my belief is in this, I actually do not believe in rich or poor…That is; not for what’s about the financial wealth of people.
I believe in an inner wealth, I believe in being a good person to yourself ánd to The Others.
I believe in people like Lennart Svensson and his family from Sweden who stood up to help our friend Steve Nyibule and his autistic brother Richard (both Lennart and Steve are on facebook, please support them with your Loving thoughts, prayers and good energy!) Steve has chosen to take care of his autistic brother Richard. Lennart and his family did a WONDERFUL job by taking care of them in a very Loving way. The way Steve takes care of his brother Richard is AMAZING… From Kenya to Sweden, from a hopeless situation to a hopeful and improving situation. This is about persistence and faith… About Trust and Belief! Many people have supported Steve and Richard, many people admire and respect him and Lennart and his family for all their efforts. Richard is improving, with little steps… They do the SonRise program, you can read more about that at www.option.org
When you read about these people, you will feel moved. The Journey they are on is fascinating, unbelievable and inspiring! These people know what it means to TRUST…They know what the word LOVE means. Uncondittional LOVE.
I believe in people like C.L. who is standing up fow who she really is! I believe in people like my friend Blue who chooses to create a positive day even though she is travelling through a hard time in her life. I believe in people who desire to live a life with Respect! With the WANT to CREATE HAPPINESS each day!
I believe in people who feel the want to let go of control and live in the Here and Now. I believe in people who decide they want to Trust each other. I believe in people who want and choose to SHARE together. I create a world around myself with people that GIVE me energy instead of only TAKE energy from me.
I decide to create more Happiness for myself each day, no matter what happens. No matter how emotions can sometimes struck me in an unexpected way. Because I OWN ME…I can decide what I CHOOSE to think, how to respond and to react to the world. I can decide each single second of my life what I believe is good for me. How about you?