We all know the illusion of “CONTROL”…..
We believe we know our future because we think things will most certainly go a certain way; the way we have planned. But what if life takes us of our well planned path and we feel like a lost child in a storm?
I believed I would fly to America in November. Then there seemed to be something wrong with my visa. I will not bother you with all kind of details, but the new fact was that I was not flying back and the expectation is I will only get permission within half a year.
My first thought was NOT: “Everything has a reason, so this must be a very good reason, since Brian and I have already been apart for over seven months before and have sworn after our marriage, we would never do that EVER again…” NO!
My first reaction was: SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!How can this be possible? This REALLY sucks….
Not very spiritual at all, then after the first emotions went down a bit I did think WOW….there must be a very good reason why this all happens, only I don’t SEE that reason at this point. But it will become clear, the more days and weeks will pass.
I did not give in to my despair though I did FEEL that for several hours. I decided to accept this new fact and started to ask the Universe/ the Light for guidance. And I decided to put my TRUST on that. Immediately I felt much better!
Of course Brian was totally upset as I first told him, but then he decided to believe that the reason would become clear and we both are open to what the Universe will enfold to us…This does not mean we don’t incredibly MISS each other, we do! But we have experienced that the Universe shows us ways which give us the most. Even when we don’t see the outcome of that, we can put our trust on it and that is exactly what we do, we TRUST and we feel curious why this all happens and what it will BRING us!
Do you remember a certain event in your life that totally mixed up your expectations? And how did you respond to that?
With anger? Fear? Or did you decide to put TRUST instead of negative emotions?
We all have a CHOICE, though we sometimes decide not to feel, see or accept we do have a choice. To Love, to Trust or to choose the opposite.
At times we get knocked off our socks (like we say here in Holland), we very often first choose to feel upset, practice anger and most of all fear…..Of course there is another variation on this all: you could also choose to feel a VICTIM…It’s all up to you!
Oh my God! Why does this happen to me?
Or worse: Oh my God, why does this have to happen to me?
Or even more worse: Oh my God, why does this have to happen to me again?
And the ultimate: Oh my God, why does this have to happen to me again, what did I do wrong to deserve this????
We all go through our own process in life. We all experience unexpected events, we all look for reasons and we all look for solutions. And we all do it the way we believe is best for us.
Love is a very powerful help when we go through events we did not expect to happen to us. Even when you are not in a relationship, even when you believe you are totally on your own, Love STILL is the MOST EMPOWERED help you have.
When something happens to you and you do not know how to solve it, when you feel deeply alone, start to feel Love. Love for yourself in the first place. Accept yourself and look at all the beautiful things, talents, thoughts, that are within you. Even when you believe you are not able to feel anything at all that could possibly make you feel happy about yourself, think back of a moment of joy…with or without a person next to you. Think of that one time you were lying in the grass, looking up into the beautiful blue sky, here and there a cloud passing by. The way you felt peaceful and happy, satisfied…Or that time you were riding your bike, looking at the young sheep, just born and jumping up and down. Think back of the moments you laughed, smiled, had fun. Think back of what you have done to please another person. Without wanting anything back for it. Just because you decided you wanted to do something nice for another person. Think back of moments, even little moments of joy and happiness and relive them…
Know that you are WORTH it. Like the advertisement on TV that says: Because I’m worth it! No wonder advertisements with this saying in it have lots of success! Every single soul wants to matter. Everyone wants to be of importance. To yourself, to another human being. By giving meaning to your life to start with! Your life is given to you, so what do you decide to make it worthwhile?
This afternoon I read this line:
“Whenever you want to make things work, you will have to do it yourself….”
This is so true. So simple and at the same time so powerful.
In my work as a therapist I have seen many people with various problems. However they all, or almost all had one thing in common. They did not look inside themselves for the solution. They projected their want to improve their lives outside of themselves. Like circumstances and other people they could blame. Once they started to understand they created the problem themselves and discovered what they could do to solve it, it seemed to be an eye opener they never expected!
Problems are in fact our most loyal friends, our disguised helpers here to wake us up and teach us that we can live our lives differently, even more easy and improve the quality of our lives immediately. Once we decide to look inside and see what our beliefs are that seem to “make” us so unhappy, we are able to change that in a second!
I decided to enjoy my Holland time that is given to me by accepting the situation. Does this mean I sit on my ass here and do nothing about it or feel like a victim? NO WAY!
I do whatever it takes to be back with my husband Brian as soon as possible! So does Brian!
The thing that we do is accept the situation and see what the reason is WHY it happens…we always FEEL each other and our Love is SO EMPOWERED that we will be given a way for sure to shorten the literal distance of 9000 miles. And though we are so many miles apart, we are together because we FEEL together. We can SENSE each other day and night…
Whenever you are alone, feel the immense power of the Universe/ the Light to comfort you, to guide you through your own personal process. Start asking for insights, start believing you are guided. Let go of Fear and start to choose to feel Trust. And experience the miracle of Love that surrounds you when you open up to that….
Each day Brian and I connect ourselves with the Universe/ the Light and ask for being together soon. Does this mean we are praying each day? Or meditating?You can call it what you believe, it’s all true.
By connecting ourselves to the Universe/ the Light, we feel TRUST instead of FEAR. And we feel GUIDED all the way.
What do you choose?
If you want to find a way to live in this more easy and empowered way, we suggest you check out the programs at The Option Institute, such as Empowering Yourself (http://www.option.org/programs:empower-yourself,15 )